Peer Career Consultant Blogs

While a student at Santa Clara University, I regularly experience some degree of Imposter Syndrome. While that might sound extreme or hyperbolic, it is most definitely true. Merriam-Webster defines Imposter Syndrome as “a psychological condition that is characterized by persistent doubt concerning one's abilities or accomplishments accompanied by the fear of being exposed as a fraud despite evidence of one's ongoing success”(Merriam-Webster). But what does this look like in real life? It would be easy to say that Imposter Syndrome is just a glorified way of saying you care about your accomplishments, and maybe you’re a little too humble. However, this is not what Imposter Syndrome is; it is so much more than just underselling your abilities. 

Some common symptoms of Imposter Syndrome that you might recognize from your own life are: 

• Consistent negative self-talk, self-doubt 
• Inability to internalize accomplishments 
• Obsessing over mistakes and failures, especially dwelling on the past
• Feeling of never being good enough 
• Overwhelming anxiety of being “found out” as a fraud 
• Setting very challenging goals and feeling disappointed when you fall short
• Irrational fears of the future 
• Feeling unworthy of success 

The most distinct memory I have of Imposter Syndrome was when I started my first internship. Last year, I interned at the City of San Jose, Office of Economic Development and Cultural Affairs, as their Marketing and Communications Intern, and I absolutely loved my experience there. I had a supervisor who truly cared about my professional development, my goals for this internship, and my well-being. I maintained regular communication with team members throughout the office and attended weekly meetings that were attended by the entire Office of Economic Development. I enjoyed everything about my internship; my supervisor trusted me with projects and tasks that went directly to our stakeholders, and I wasn’t being overwhelmed with assignments, but I could feel the pressure building. 

After my first week, I started to get nervous before meeting with my supervisor, worried that he would find some huge mistake that I had missed, and it would suddenly disintegrate any trust my supervisor had in me. I would present information from the Marketing and Communications Corner to the entire OEDCA team during our weekly meetings, but minimize the positive feedback and obsess over any constructive feedback. Sometimes I would walk into work worrying that I was underqualified and inadequate compared to the last intern. It felt like every other intern knew exactly what they were doing, and I was the only one who had to “fake it till I made it”. I hadn’t realized it in the moment, but what I was experiencing was imposter syndrome. 

Later on in the year, I attended an ACE Leadership Program session on imposter syndrome, and the examples really stayed with me. Slowly, I started to show up to work with a different mindset. The best part of an internship is being able to learn on the job. Aside from your hard skills and qualifications that clearly got you the internship, your employer is not expecting you to know how to perform every aspect of the job. This means that you should be asking questions. Ask to sit in on the meeting, ask to take on a new project, ask for feedback, and suddenly you’ve expanded your role far beyond the description. Something that I was insecure about in the workplace, being seen as incompetent, ended up becoming my greatest strength. Asking questions will only open more avenues for learning, which will only improve your performance and bolster your confidence even further. Imposter syndrome doesn’t have a magic pill to cure the feeling of inadequacy; the important thing is that you have the tools to address the symptoms and know when to ask for help.

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